In Part I of this series, I spoke to the importance of examining the unconscious strategies we use to navigate our roles and lives. I shared the shadow side of my seemingly benevolent strategy of “getting kids to like me” to prevent challenging behavior. And I asked you to reflect on the ways some of your own unconscious strategies might impact students and colleagues. In Part 2, I explore more ways self-awareness can increase your positive impact and reduce unconscious harm.

As a young teacher back in 1990, my unconscious strategy for classroom management was to be really nice to students so they would feel motivated to do what I asked and be nice to me back. It worked. It turns out that being nice to students — treating them with dignity, as human beings with needs, hurts, and struggles of their own — creates the respect, safety, voice, and sense of belonging needed for authentic engagement and real learning. This strategy had a lot of positive

How Principals Can Slow Down, and Why They Might Want To, written by Jessica Cabeen, argues that while school leadership often defaults to relentless sprint-driven deadlines, crises, and initiatives, adopting a more deliberate and "slow" pace is the most effective way to achieve lasting institutional change and prevent burnout. A constant state of urgency, though initially exhilarating, eventually leads to exhaustion and the disorientation of not knowing how to maintain a sta

Drawing from personal experiences of childhood trauma and a recent instance of being blamed, Lisa Bedinger highlights how blame can stem from a desire for control or a way to avoid feelings of shame and responsibility. While acknowledging that others can cause significant pain, Lisa emphasizes the importance of not dwelling in blame. Instead, she advocates for self-reflection when the urge to blame arises, suggesting questions to explore one's own role, triggers, and opportun

We talked at our Starling Collaborative team meeting today about the changes occurring in our country that are starting to impact our work and our field. I came away from the conversation with deep gratitude for the team I work with and that we are in this work together. I also came out of our conversation with several insights.